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no more spamming this thread!


maverick
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How To Make Spam

 

Hi kids! I'm Copious Barfon, the leading chef for iffy recipes in the US, and

today I'm going to show you how to make a *jumbo size pack of Spam , one

that's so BIG you will have enough for you and ALL your friends! But watch out,

I can't guarantee they'll still be friends after they've tried it. (Note: I had

to change the ingredients slightly to keep animal rights groups from suing me.)

 

Ingredients:

One cow (a terminally depressed, suicidal cow that has no desire whatever to

live anymore and is quite happy to sacrifice its life to be an ingredient in

suspect cuisine)

 

One pig (with a similar outlook on life to the cow)

 

A ten kilo slice of whale blubber

A large pot of moisturiser

A can of petrol

 

Utensils:

A cement mixer

A clothes peg

Two hand guns

 

Directions:

Put the peg on your nose and mix the petrol up with the whale blubber. Feed

the pig half of this mixture, the cow the other half. Pigs will eat anything,

but the cow may need some persuasion even if it's suicidal.

If all else fails, hold its nose until it moos in protest and shove it all in

quickly. Give the cow a pat on the back, but don't let it give you one.

Allow the animals a few hours to digest it, then take their last wills and

testaments before providing each one with a hand gun.

After they shoot themselves, and you have stood for a minutes respectful

silence, carve the animals up into three piles. Pile A for the bones, brains

and balls, Pile B for the fat, Pile C for the best cuts.

Throw Pile C away, you won't need it. Keep Pile B for when you next visit

Burger King; they need all the fat they can get for their Bacon Double

Cheesburgers. Place Pile A in the cement mixer, and turn it on. After an hour,

it should start to resemble Spam. Taste it, and you'll tell by that feeling of

faint nausea, that this is indeed Spam. But it is not yet spreadable! So Add

the moisturiser until it is.

And there you have it!

The Link

 

try it fried

my mum fried it for me once nearly made me puke

oops this is spamming ain't it ?

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Guest c4evap
Black cats are Evil!

 

Best shoot it to make sure!

 

:p

 

I can't! He doubles as my backup computer...

deadcatcase.jpg

 

c4 ;)

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Not wishing to spam but what's happened with a post I made in the Birthdays thread perhaps more "funnies somewhere else?"

Here perhaps?

At least it shows some are keeping a close eye on the forum!

I might just use it as my sig. In fact I think I will.

 

When I figure out how to. Help please.

 

 

 

 

 

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